Ten C-Section Tips You'll Thank Me For

I have two babies, and I had two c-sections. I had planned with my first to have a traditional birth, but it didn't work out. Thus began my foray into the world of c-section and its recovery, a world I had never looked into before because I didn't plan on having one!

I would first like to dispel the myth/faulty belief that if you have a c-section, then you really didn't have a baby. Are you freaking kidding me? I guess people who believe this think you make an appointment, the doctor unzips you, peacefully takes the baby out, zips you back up, and you all go home in painless bliss.

I see it like paying with cash vs. credit: vaginal birth - pay now; c-section - pay later. With cash, it hurts to take that hard-earned cash out of your wallet, but the pain is immediate and the bulk of it is over relatively quickly. With credit, it's less of a deal to take the credit card out of your wallet, but the pain comes later when you get the bill and stays with you longer when you have to pay interest on that purchase. Either way, you still pay, no two ways about it.

If you have a c-section, don't let anyone diminish the experience by leading you to believe that your delivery was somehow "less" than a traditional birth because that is simply not true. Yes of course labor is painful, and pushing can be traumatic (even for the partner who is there coaching!). But c-section recoveries are notoriously long and can be much more complicated than regular recoveries, and there are more risks associated with the surgery than with traditional births, which is why most doctors prefer to try a regular delivery first if possible. And it can be just as traumatic for the partner in the operating room watching surgeons rearrange your internal organs!

Now, onto my top 10 c-section tips no one really tells you.

1. My single biggest one? ACCEPT ALL HELP OFFERED. And if none is offered, ASK. This one is no joke. If you have a traditional birth, you might be a little sore, you may be dealing with a few stitches, and of course you'll be very tired. With a c-section, you'll be all that plus you'll be in actual, meaningful pain and you will not be able to take stairs, lift anything, and you are likely to have tons of swelling in your legs, making even walking uncomfortable. Even having my husband there to help me find a good pillow position for nursing (since I couldn't reach or twist too well) was huge. But eventually hubby has to go back to work, and an extra pair of hands to help with laundry, preparing bottles, and getting the baby in and out of the car for pediatrician appointments is essential. Trust me, if you try to do these things yourself, you will only delay your recovery and possibly rip your stitches/staples. So even if you are the DIY type, please, this time ACCEPT ALL HELP. If people are kind enough to offer, it means they really want to help. And this is especially true for good friends and family members (grandparents in particular)... it helps them feel more connected to you and your baby and become part of the experience! Win-win!


2. The shaking. It is not unheard of to shake like a friggin' leaf as a side effect of the anesthesia. Sometimes your whole body will shake, sometimes it is just one little part of you. This is normal but it can be unsettling. I experienced this with my first c-section and it made me feel like a freak, but no one seemed to notice except me and my husband.


3. THE HOT BLANKETS. Oooooh, this was the best part of the c-section. Ok besides the baby. The operating room is cold. The anesthesia can make you feel even colder. They give you very very warm blankets and they put them all over you and it is the best thing EVER. I want some right now. It's almost a good enough reason to have a third c-section!


4. Shoulder pain. This one sounds random, but it is not as rare as you might think. I have read two causes for this: either referred nerve pain from the trauma of the cutting of the abdominal muscles, or trapped air bubbles that travel upward once the incision is closed. Either way, it KILLS. I did not experience this with my first, but with my second c-section I sure did! In my case, it came on all of a sudden and I felt it through my right shoulder, down the back of it and into my ribcage. I can do some pain, but this one brought me to tears. Didn't help that my nurse was like, "hm, weird!" We only found out from another nurse that this occurs in some c-sections and it is nothing to be worried about. To try and prevent as much of this as you can, ask for some kind of Simethicone (like Gas-X) as soon as you get back to your room if they haven't given it to you already... and keep it coming. Otherwise, just gotta grin and bear it.


5. Since I brought up nurses, let's talk about nurses. In my two 4-day-each hospital excursions, I found there are incredibly GREAT nurses who you want to bring home with you and stay in touch with forever, and then there are -- well, the other ones. I had a couple nurses who really could have cared less if I was comfortable, in pain, needing help to get to the bathroom or change clothes, etc. They came in, dispensed medication (often late), took my vitals, asked me noncommitally if I needed anything else as they had one foot out the door, and you didn't hear from them again until you buzzed them for something (at which time they came in with an attitude). The only thing you can really do is suck it up and realize their shift will likely be over in less than 12 hours. If they are really bad or rude, dismissive or mean, feel free to contact the client relations agent in your hospital. This should be a comfortable, helpful time for you as you recover from major surgery with your brand new baby. You don't need extra stress! But if the nurse is just detached or cold, just do your best to ignore her and wait for the next shift nurse! Most of the ones I had were either very good or truly awesome.


6. If you want to try to breastfeed, ask for a lactation specialist stat! In many hospitals, they will be up your butt anyway, so you might not really need to worry about asking for one. But nursing after you have a c-section is a WHOLE different thing from nursing after a traditional delivery. You are super sore, you have to be extremely mindful of your incision, and normal movements like sitting up, leaning back, shifting, twisting or putting your arms behind you in any way can be scary painful. Having a lactation specialist work with you to figure out the top 2 or 3 positions the baby likes can eliminate lots of guesswork and therefore lots of extra movements. She can also show you how to best use the tools (like breastfeeding support pillows, regular pillows, washcloths, etc.) that will totally help. Side note: if you and your LC don't click, don't feel bad. I had one kind of weird crunchy one that took my tears of frustration personally and got an attitude, and I had another more modern one who was helpful but was short with me when I couldn't "just scoot up and put the pillow behind you." In the end, one of my first regular room nurses ended up being the very best at helping me try to nurse while hardly being able to move!


7. Oh, the swelling. How much will depend on the person, but chances are good that if you have a c-section, everything below the knee (and maybe even above) will swell. This happens because of all the saline they pump into your IV after major surgery. I suffered from swollen feet and ankles (WAY more than in pregnancy) with my first c-section, but my second one brought a whole other kind of swelling I didn't even know existed. In the hospital, I was swollen from my toes up to my hips. Once home, it had settled to just the knee down, but it was INTENSE. My skin felt like it was about to burst. A couple times I tried to sit with one leg bent under me on the couch and OH MY GOODNESS was that a mistake. Two weeks later, the calves were improving but I still could not wear shoes. I am serious. It took a full 7 weeks for the swelling to completely dissipate. To avoid it as much as possible, drink as much as you can from that giant water bottle they give you in the hospital. You have to take it a little slow at first, but at some point you can chug a lug, and I recommend it. Yes that'll mean more bathroom trips (once your catheter comes out! Ew!) but it will flush out all that saline and your swelling will improve. Keep it up once you get home!
   


8. Your memory might be fuzzy, especially right after surgery. Guys, I'm telling you, with both my c-sections there were things I don't remember and things I completely made up. For example, with my first, I could have SWORN they brought us the baby like an hour after we got up to the recovery room. In reality, the baby never left our side. And with my second, I was all upset because I remembered not being allowed to try nursing her right after the surgery. I was complaining about this MONTHS later to my husband and he said, "yes you did, when we got to the aftercare room they gave her to you and you tried nursing her, both sides." I have zero memory of this. So what I am saying is: be prepared for a fuzzy period right after surgery. You may not experience this (and I hope you don't, cause it's kinda sad), but just expect it. I didn't know about it, and it made me feel terrible after the fact.


9. You might be numb in spots near your incision. Like, forever. Or maybe just for a little while. I had several spots along my incision that were numb for months afterward. I still have a little one, about 1", that is numb and it has been 14+ months since my second c-section. My mom still has one to this day from my sister who is 30-something. Totally normal.


10. Do not stress about the scar. I was not a bikini-wearing supermodel before I got pregnant, so I wasn't overly concerned with how my scar would look in a tiny boyshort, but even if you are a supermodel, be not concerned. You HAD A BABY dude. You carried that sucker for 9 months, had morning sickness, food aversion, smell aversion, swelling, bad maternity fashion, other assorted ailments not fit for public consumption, and then had major surgery on top of it. So are you seriously going to stress about a 4 or 5 inch little scar? That's dumb! Wear it like a badge of honor! Then later in life, discreetly show it to your child to guilt them into cooperating with your every rule and to your husband to remind him what you went through to give HIM a child (expect flowers within 48 hours of the reminder). See, it's a good thing!

Hope those help some of you, and good luck!